A N N O T A T I O N S
PASTELOGRAM is named in honor of the poet Marianne Moore, who was
commission- ed by Ford Motor Co. in the 1950s to come up with names for its new mid-priced car.
Among her suggestions: “Pastelogram,” “Turco- tinga,” “Silver Sword,” “Resilient Bullet,” “Utopian Turtletop”
and the especially cryptic “Mongoose Civique.” Ford declined to use any of these and instead went with “Edsel.” The rest is history.
FUN A LA MODE
WE’VE HAD LOTS
of requests asking
the Curator: “You’re so darn modest, we don’t know much about
you. How about posting a picture or some biographical info? And
have I told you about the time I was abducted by aliens?” Well, you get the idea. So here’s a little about our
The old Patent Office applications in the PatentRoom
are a soft- serve lesson in history. New on the menu:
The early aircraft designs on view at AdventureLounge
will take you back, though maybe not all in one piece.
ARE YOUR SCANS limp, lifeless, lacking pep and vim? Visit ScanTips
for fast, safe, effective relief.
of Josh Agle.
Martinis, girls, guns. Think James Bond meets Jetsons at a
tiki bar in Palm Springs.
L I N K A T O R I U M
CAR MANUAL PROJECT
RAY PATIN STUDIOS
PALACE OF CULTURE
KING OF THE ROAD
BROCHURES ON EBAY
≈ In Memoriam
A real class act ended her run
the morning of July 15, and the world is now a much emptier place. We
miss you, Mom.
FRIDAY, JULY 29, 2005
≈ Schlitz With Food and Fun and Sun!
What a wonderful way to put
thirst in the shade. Schlitz! World over, more people choose
this superb refresher than any other beer, at any price.
Schlitz is the smart way to cool off. It fills thirst, but
never you. Brisk, stand-up flavor, smoothed by just the kiss
of the hops. All beer, and yet light. So light . . .
≈ Playtime’s Largest-Selling Beer!
Is there a finer cooling system
under the sun? Schlitz! So light and refreshing. Whirls lightly
through the thirstiest thirst. Schlitz is a well-planned
secret. Sympathetic brewing. Skill that brings out flavor with
just the kiss of the hops. So well-suited to the modern taste.
Never, never filling. (Even with charcoal-broiled steaks!)
≈ Leisure’s Light Refresher!
Half the fun of today’s light
living is the light foods and less-filling beverages that let
you keep pace. Refreshment that brightens leisure. Schlitz
enters in so well. This light refresher is brewed precisely
right for modern tastes. Never filling, not a bit bitter, its
delicate flavor is smoothed by just the kiss of the hops.
Schlitz fills your need for refreshment, but never you,
not even at mealtimes . . .
From 1956, a beer trifecta from Jos. Schlitz Brewing of
Milwaukee. (Note mid-century progenitors of
portable video.) Schlitz, the
world’s best-selling beer in 1956, was acquired by Stroh
Brewing in 1982 and is now a Pabst brand, available in a
handful of states.
WEDNESDAY, JULY 27, 2005
≈ The Secret That Was Kept Four
Secrets about the invisible and
mysterious atoms that whirled through space to form the universe
are now being revealed. Just as nature made its gigantic solar
system, present-day scientists, by reshuffling the at0ms, are
making miniature solar systems in the form of new molecules that
become synthetic organic chemicals . . .
From 1940, an illustration for Union Carbide’s Carbide and
Carbon Chemicals division. No Photoshop, no cgi, just a
paintbrush and paint, and they were able to come up with
this. Not too shabby.
TUESDAY, JULY 26, 2005
≈ Newest New Car of the
IT’S THE 1941 De SOTO . .
. and what a car it is! Seventeen feet, four inches of
automobile. Long, low-slung, rakish . . . with a
front end so beautiful it makes you tingle just to see it!
De Soto hugs the road — “floats” over rough spots. Power galore
— effortless performance. De Soto Fluid Drive now combined with
the new Simplimatic Transmission — gives you full Automatic
Shifting for all normal driving! New, longer, wider Rocket
Bodies! Rich, spacious Two-Tone Interiors with Form-Rest
Seats . . .
DeSoto’s stopgap answer to the Oldsmobile Hydra-Matic
transmission, Simplimatic shifting allowed for clutch-free
driving in most situations. The 1941 model year marked the
debut of a DeSoto styling hallmark for many years, the waterfall grille.
≈ First Choice of the Pros
People look to the “pro” — the
man who makes his living in any line — for sound advice.
In the truck field the “pro” is the transport operator. Every
penny of his profit comes directly from the operation of his
trucks as they roll mile after mile on the road! That’s why
White developed Super Power for the transport operator
first . . .
From 1941, an ad for White Trucks in an array of Easter egg
≈ Lift the Mask . . .
And see your old friend copper
at work! The 1941 cars sport new colors — new lines — new
alloys and engineering triumphs. But behind the glistening new
fronts, the radiators are copper or copper alloy just as in the
cars of 1930, 1920 and 1905 . . .
A pleasantly spooky ad for Revere Copper and Brass from late
SUNDAY, JULY 24, 2005
≈ Mrs. Taxi-Driver
There’s no meter on her “cab,”
but she has plenty of regular customers. She is on call for
trips to school, store, station and a dozen other places. Her
children and her neighbors are her “fares.” She drives more
miles than her husband — for the “taxi service” of the American
housewife is a large part of her life. Since women spend so much
of their time behind the wheel of an automobile, they exert a
strong influence upon trends in automotive design . . .
From 1941, a public-service ad
from the Ethyl Corporation, whose tetraethyl lead anti-knock
fluid put the lead in gasoline.
SATURDAY, JULY 23, 2005
≈ Slideshow, Part II
Just in from England, more
Kodachromes of the anonymous Great Falls family whose
red Chevrolet graces our
home page. Here are the kids
on July 3, 1960, having a picnic lunch next to the tent at
Glacier National Park in Montana. And is
this) the same family in the
summer of 1958? Bonus slide:
Louise does yardwork. (For some reason raking the leaves
seemed to take absolutely forever.)
FRIDAY, JULY 22, 2005
≈ If You Love Beauty You’ll Love
LONG — LOW — WIDE . . .
De Soto is refreshing to look at — and to ride in.
There’s a new kind of comfort here! Every line of this Rocket
Body De Soto says “Quality”! And with this beauty goes 105
horsepower . . . new Miracle Ride! See De Soto. Try
Fluid Drive with Simplimatic Transmission with real No-Shift
Driving! This means, for all normal driving you don’t have to
touch the clutch or gearshift! It’s thrilling! Don’t miss
it! De Soto prices start at $898 in Detroit. Custom Convertible
Coupe illustrated, $1195 at Detroit.
Right before the storm clouds of war got too thick was the
perfect time to take your new DeSoto ragtop for a spin. In May
1941 all you had to worry about was the occasional hail of
MONDAY, JULY 11, 2005
≈ Out to Lunch
We’re taking a break, so there won’t be any
updates for a week or two. Patentroom.com
webmaster Ken will be answering e-mail. — David
SUNDAY, JULY 10, 2005
≈ Can You Hear Me Now?
A telephone call is such a
happy and comforting way to keep in touch with family and
friends no matter where they live. Isn’t there someone,
somewhere, you’d like to talk with right now? It’s so easy, and
the cost is small. Call by number. It’s twice as fast.
In 1958, a nighttime station-to-station call from Kansas City
to New York cost $1.45 for the first three minutes and 40
cents for each additional minute, or $4.25 for a
10-minute call — about $27 in today’s money. [CLICK
≈ Buick for 1958
Put yourself behind the wheel
of a B-58 Buick and feel a completely new experience in driving.
For here is power deliberately provided for your well-being and
safety — power more than ample to easily handle any road
situation you may meet. And with this power a new performance
born of Flight Pitch Dynaflow that can switch the pitch a
million different ways. You've never sensed such immediate
response and effortless ease. See you Buick dealer today.
Buick's “B-58” designation was a tie-in to the Air Force's new
B58 supersonic strategic bomber, a crash-prone aircraft that
was overshadowed — and long outlived — by the B-52. [CLICK
FRIDAY, JULY 8, 2005
≈ On the Road, 1956-1964
Our curator of photography
recently acquired a little yellow box of Kodachromes (i.e.
snagged off eBay, from a seller in Great Britain), with CARS written
on the lid in pencil. Inside are about two dozen mounted slides
taken in the United States by persons unknown. The best of the lot is one
of a 1960 Chevrolet station wagon (currently gracing our home
page) that has this caption inked on the mount: “Great Falls,
Mont. Return home after 3 wks vacation. June 27,
1964.” There are two other pictures of the same car out west in 1961 and
1963. Where are you now, Great Falls family with the red Chevy
wagon? And how’d you end up in England?
THURSDAY, JULY 7, 2005
≈ Nice Serve!
The goodness of Malt helps beer
do more than quench your thirst. Healthy values join the
Fun-Flavored refreshment of beer or ale brewed with Barley Malt.
You satisfy your thirst — and more — because Malt contributes dextrins and maltose that aid digestion . . .
B-complex vitamins and minerals, too. These healthful factors
are good reasons why you’re wise to enjoy beer and other
food products that contain Malt.
Another entry in the Barley & Malt Institute’s curious ad
campaign of 1959, illustrated by Edward Augustiny.
WEDNESDAY, JULY 6, 2005
≈ The Boy of Summer
From 1940, an amazing cover
illustration for Collier’s by Ronald McLeod. The ballplayer looks
an awful lot like Kevin Costner in “Bull Durham” 48 years later.
TUESDAY, JULY 5, 2005
≈ You Like It, It Likes You
Why play with thirst?
Quenching’s easy with 7-Up! This sparkling drink removes the
very cause of thirst by stimulating the natural flow of moisture
in your mouth. That’s why you have no come-back thirst when you
finish a 7-Up. Too good to be true? Just have a chilled bottle
For those of you who were wondering, we present this
explanation, from 1958, of the physiology behind 7-Up.
MONDAY, JULY 4, 2005
≈ Have a Safe and Happy Fourth
From 1951, a ginger ale bottle
rocket. How we pine for the days of glass soda bottles and
unregulated fireworks. But that was then and this is now. So
be careful out there.
≈ Friday Night Schlitzfry, 1958
Be good to yourself. Schlitz is
one of the finer things in life that everybody can afford. Move
up to quality . . . move up to Schlitz. World’s best
seller at any price.
From 1958, a static example of the proto-anime style used in
mid-century television commercials. This charming
illustration, one in a series, is signed with the initials
J.K. (Disclaimer: This Web site and the
Jos. Schlitz Brewing Co. have no connection except for our mutual love of
≈ Raiders of the Schlitzbox
Your guests deserve the best.
Move up to quality . . . move up to Schlitz.
It’s one of the finer things of life blah blah blah.
The same crowd as above, with the addition of a redhead, cute
cat and dachshund (note can of WOOF dog food). Just home from an evening at the theater — “Romeo and
Juliet” at the Lyceum — they’re ready for a midnight snack
(or all-night bender, to judge from the contents of the
fridge). There are
probably dozens of these, and we plan to spend the rest of
our life digging them up and restoring them, just for you.
We really deserve some kind of medal.
≈ The Dream Pen
Back in 1958, new products were
not merely unveiled or introduced, they were “announced.” Here
we have the announcement of a new kind of pen. Well, new
yet old: The last gasp of the fountain pen as a mass-market
item, in the days when space-age ball-points were on the march.
≈ Brew Sniffers
Three perky caffeine consumers
illustrate the evolution of a 1958 ad campaign for Chase & Sanborn
coffee: First we have C&S “TV hostess”
Joyce Gordon, followed by
and Mrs. Right, demonstrating the
assertion that one can “smell the flavor” of Chase’s new instant
coffee. In the first two, the “smell” is an ooky-looking brown gas. In the third, it’s morphed into much
more appetizing flavor tendrils.
SATURDAY, JULY 2, 2005
≈ 1958 Ford Family of Fine Cars
So new — they almost make the
others look like yesterday. New ideas . . . that’s
what our 1958 cars are made of. 67 different models, with so
many wonderful choices, it’s like designing your own car. Loaded
with new ideas . . .
The recession year of 1958 found Ford Motor Company with an
array of new models including the Edsel, a huge new Lincoln
and an upscale stretched Mercury called the Park Lane. Sales
of these cars ranged from disappointing to spectacularly,
legendarily awful, in the case of the Edsel. One bright spot
was the four-passenger Thunderbird, which debuted too late
in the model year to be shown in this ad. Time magazine’s
online archive (subscription required, although some days
it’s free) has two related articles of interest:
“Too Many Models”
and a cover story on Ford styling guru George Walker,
“The Cellini of Chrome.”
≈ 1958 Ford Family of Fine Cars #2
Our convertibles have
more fun than anybody. You wanted a convertible with a steel
top. It’s here, the only one of its kind in the world. You
wanted a four-seater Thunderbird. We made it for you. And how
about a rear window that rolls down at the touch of a button?
You can have that, too . . .
Part 2 of the 1958 product parade features convertibles,
including the plush Mercury Park Lane and unique Continental
Mark III, whose cloth top had an electrically operated
glass rear window that rolled down. The Ford Skyliner and
its gee-whiz retractable metal roof lasted three years.
The artist signed his or her name as Goodi.
FRIDAY, JULY 1, 2005
≈ 1958 Juice Jamboree
Summertime is fun time, and
here are twelve reasons why . . . a dozen different
fruit juices, full of fresh flavor and Vitamin C. Biggest
selection ever! Stock up at your grocer’s now.
The “12 delicious juice-time favorites”: ORANGE DRINK • TROPI-CAL FRUIT PUNCH • PINK LEMONADE • PINEAPPLE GRAPEFRUIT
DRINK • Grape Juice • Limeade • Orange Juice • Tangerine
Juice • Pineapple Juice • Grapefruit-Orange Blend • Lemonade
• Grapefruit Juice
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